Per Aspera Ad Astra

10 miles easy with Holly.  To Liberty Park, 4 loops, a little extra out and back, to get the mileage to even out, and then back home.  8:10 pace, super super chill run; I felt like going very easy and Holly didn't want to go faster than 8:00 or so, so it worked out.  Saw Allie biking at Liberty Park again!

10 miles, starting late (11:30).  Had a date at 7, and didn't get to run beforehand, got home at 9:30-ish, and since it was already dark, I lazed around for a good 2 hours before getting out the door. Hah.  Route was my place to 9th east to 27th south to 5th east, and back.  I felt really fluid tonight (going as easy as I did yesterday certainly didn't hurt), so after a really easy feeling 7:22 first mile with about 80 feet of drop and 75 feet of gain and the next 4 miles at 6:40 average pace, with a net downhill of 135' in those 4 miles, still feeling really easy, I decided to throw in a few miles on the harder end of what marathon pace should be.  Mile 6 was 6:18 (30' down, 15' up), and mile 7 was 6:12 pace for the first 1/3 of a mile before my watch died (+/- 5 feet, no noticeable hills), and mile 8 was similar to mile 7.  Of course, based on the altitude, marathon effort would be roughly 17 seconds per mile faster at sea level.  IE, marathon effort 6:15s up here are more like 5:58s at sea level, which would be my ultimate goal pace at Phoenix if my training goes extraordinarily well in the next 3 1/2 months.  Anyway, after mile 8, I jogged the last 2 miles back uphill to the Aves at 7:30-8:00 pace.  Throwing around a few miles on the faster end of MP here and there in base phase seems like a good plan.  It's not taxing with just a few miles, so it doesn't decrease my ability to get in decent mileage, but it also keeps me in touch with the pace I want to be racing at in March.

Lunch time, mostly with Josh, Shoreline Trail.  Garmin has 7.2, but it didn't connect until I was almost at the Trax, so it was more like 7.5.

Late PM: 6 miles.  Was going to do all of the first 5.5 with Holly, but she was tired after spending the day playing with her friends at doggy daycare, so she started dragging quickly, even at 8:00 pace.  I dropped her off at home after 3 miles and finished the 5.5 by myself.  After that, some drunken loser had parked in my apartment complex's driveway, preventing cars from getting out, so I jogged over to the grocery store and back for another half mile (OK, in all fairness, I was going to go on foot either way, but I'm still annoyed that someone would block in 15-20 cars from getting out of our lot).  I called to have it towed, but unfortunately they moved it before getting their car towed and having to pay a fine (after blocking everyone in for 45 minutes).  Bummer, especially considering that they took off extremely erratically, swerving around while driving way over the limit on the wrong side of the street, so then I just called them in for an almost certain DUI.

Big fat zero.  Didn't finish working until 5:30 AM, which kind of negated the whole running thing.

Slept in until noon after not going to bed until 6-ish (was up very late finishing a research proposal).  I'm not celebrating Thanksgiving until tomorrow, so I skied in the afternoon, then went out for a run at 7 PM.  I celebrated everyone's favorite USA holiday of Black Friday Eve (who really even calls it Thanksgiving anymore?) by donning my 'Murican Flag running shorts and going for an 18.5 mile run past the crowds at Best Buy, Walmart, Target, City Creek Mall, and more! Hurray for wasting money on cheap junk!

17.2 by myself, then cooled down 1.3 more with Holly.  Route was my place to 9th East to 45th South to State to 21st South to 300 West to South Temple, back home.  First 17.2 was at about 6:52 pace and felt pretty easy.  I didn't drink anything, but had a gel at mile 12.  After that, I picked up Holly and did a tiny 1.3 mile loop in the Aves at something like 8:45 pace.  I don't remember exactly, but it was very slow.  I did the whole run in my Air Krongs and they were good.  My feet were maybe ever so slightly sore at the end, but it was 18.5 miles in super light flats, so that's not unexpected.

Celebrated Thanksgiving with my boss and his family, then went for a late night (11 PM) 11 mile easy run (7:38 average pace).  Ran to 13th East, to 27th South, to Highland, to 21st South, to 9th East, and back home.  Nice and chill.

I was thinking on my run about all of the things I have to be thankful for.  There are many: I have many wonderful opportunities in life, I'm healthy and able to run, I have a wonderful family that supports me, I live in a place that allows me to enjoy the outdoors, and much more.  However, one thing sticks out to me, and I hope it's something that those of you who read this will keep in mind this holiday season.  What I am most thankful for lately is my honesty and integrity regarding my beliefs.

For the first ten years of my life, my parents were pretty anti-theistic and for good reason.  Something unbelievably tragic happened to one of my parents as a youth, something that no-one should ever have to go through, and it happened in the name of Jesus Christ.  Nevertheless, when I was roughly ten, my mother became an Evangelical Christian, which meant that my entire family ended up "accepting" the doctrine of Christianity.  I was a good kid growing up; I wanted to honor my parents, and because I knew them to be excellent people, I wanted to obey them.  However, this came at a cost.

While I professed a Christian faith, deep down, my young rational mind could not fully accept my religion.  How could I trust in a god that intentionally degraded women and told them to remain silent in church (1st Corinthians 14:34)?  How could I trust in a god whose believers were purportedly not chosen on merit, but rather on the blind luck of being born into family that followed the right rituals (your odds of being a Christian are astronomically higher if born to Christian parents)?  How could I trust in a god who requires the murder of an entire town if one member of that town didn't believe in him (Deuteronomy 13:13-19)?  How could I trust in a god who requires the murder of anyone that works on a Sunday (Exodus 31:15)?  How could I trust in a god that condoned not just slavery, but of selling women into sex slavery (Exodus 21:7)?  How could I trust in a god that purportedly created me with doubts and yet will banish me to hell for my disbelief?  As an aside, don't get me wrong; I'm not trying to proselytize.  I'm just trying to give an idea as to where I was coming from.

Unfortunately, these thoughts led to a feeling of shame while growing up.  My friends at church professed their faith, but I knew at my core that I could never accept this belief system.  Being a non-believer is inherently "dirty".  As George Bush Sr said, "No, I don't know that atheists should be regarded as citizens, nor should they be regarded as patriotic. This is one nation under God.… I support the separation of church and state. I'm just not very high on atheists."  As a recent study demonstrated, North Americans are more inclined to suspect atheists than rapists for theft.  So, not wanting to be looked down upon and not wanting to disappoint my friends and family, I continued to lie to myself and others about my deepest feelings.

However, once I entered graduate school, things began to change for me.  While I was being mentored by some of the smartest individuals in the world, I came to realize that reason and rational thought are concepts to be cherished, not to be looked down upon, and finally, I became willing to admit that I am, and always have been a non-believer.

Since this admission, I have become truly happy with my life.  I no longer possess a sense of internal conflict and shame; in fact, my life has become considerably more meaningful.  Knowing that I have one chance to truly make a difference for humanity makes me all the more inclined to work hard to improve the lives of others through my scientific research.  Knowing that the world came about through an evolution over the course of billions of years makes it all the more remarkable and breathtaking.  Knowing that I may be considered an untrustworthy person due to my values of sincerity, intellectual integrity, reason, and rational thought is no longer a concern.  Knowing that not all of those that I previously knew would currently accept me is no longer a concern.  My happiness is simply more important.

The best thing in all of this is that my family has undergone a similar trajectory.  They are no longer theistic or anti-theistic, but just good people that dedicate their lives to improving the world.  Even if they were still evangelicals, I realize now that they were never defined by this; as good people, their love has always been unconditional and they would always have accepted me regardless of my beliefs.

This holiday season, I am thankful for being able to be radically honest with myself and others as to what I believe.  I most certainly do not have the universe figured out, but I am truly happy about being able to admit that.  Life is a special thing and I'm thankful for what I have in mine right now.  I'm not sure exactly why I've chosen to post this here, but I suppose it's because of the fact that I've read a lot of cool personal details about a lot of the other local runners in Utah on here and just felt like sharing some things about me.  My goal is not to offend, so I sincerely hope I have not done so.  Ok, off to bed now...

Afternoon: A couple hours of skiing at Snowbird, which was a blast.  PM: 9 miles very easy (8:00 pace) with Holly.  Ran to 9th East, then to I-80 and back home.